DAILY DOSE: "Friendly Intentions and Fair-Weather Smiles"

Happy Friday, moppets.

Pretty much 113% of everything on my mind has to do with a game I can’t talk about. However, it IS “Black and Gold Day II” here in the City of Champions, and you KNOW that I stepped up to the plate with my oh so svelte-looking black v-neck/yellow dress shirt combo. Thus ends the first-and-last ever Kingdom Fashion Report by Adam.

Moving right along, I played a very special game of Madden 2004 last night, and let the entire city down. 20-17 Pats over TTTWNBN. For the record, I haven’t played in a few months, and it was first foray into the magical realm known as “All-Madden Level.” I don’t think it really counts as an accurate portrayal of the game, though, because my roster included Larry Johnson and a number of fictional players created through the draft. Also, my team was decidedly Ben-less, being that he’s not on the game, and they didn’t have Corey Dillon, either. For the record, they got both their TDs on turnovers. Tommy Gun threw FOUR picks in the game (one was a hail Mary, though). Seems the O-Line kept collapsing, and he kept getting hit as he threw, leading to ugly throws, and uglier INTs. Also, Antwaan Randle-El fumbled a kickoff that was returned for 6, and even went so far as to injure himself for the entire game.

What this means for the team on Sunday is anybody’s guess. But I’m hoping to AVENGE last night’s loss tonight, and then settle the score once and for all with the appropriate rubber match.

And yes. I have no life.

Your Song of the Day is “Rough Draft,” and yes, it’s more Yellowcard. I know, I know. Honest, I try to keep from using the same band more than once a week, but these things happen. I found this song nestled into my directory the other night, and had no recollection of illegally downloading it. Then, lo and behold, after listening to it, realized it’s very poetic and beautiful. It’s been stuck in my head ever since. I thoroughly recommend tracking this one down.

With that, I give you LINKAPALOOZA 2005! There were just TOO many good ones to choose from today, most of which are taken from CNN.com. Proving, as usual, that the real world is MUCH funnier than anything I can find on the web.

First up, your science update for the day. Nothing particularly funny here, just cool. However, I think I’m the last regular average Joe-Citizen who is still captivated and blown away by everything and anything space-exploration related. Basically, we landed a probe on the surface of Saturn’s big moon, Titan (it’s bigger than Mercury) and found out that the whole thing’s covered in liquid natural gas and frozen methane. I find it amazing that if there were just a little bit of Oxygen on it somewhere, “it would’ve exploded a long time ago.” Oddly, the same thing happens to me when I watch Oxygen. Good thing they don’t get DirecTV on Titan. (Yes: that joke was terrible/lame.)

Next up is sad/funny, if only because I KNEW it was coming. If you’ve been watching 24, you know all about how all the EVIL people this season are Muslim terrorists. This includes the mastermind Araz family, who have done such amazingly dastardly things as poison their teenage son’s girlfriend “for the cause.” The “cause” as of so far, includes kidnapping the Sec. of Defense and holding him for public trial for crimes against humanity over the Internet. But I digress. I’ve not watched the first three seasons of 24, but wasn’t last year’s EVIL leader a Columbian Drug Lord, or something? Where was the PSA about how not all Columbians are evil? Yes, I know that anti-Muslim sentiment has been an underlying theme of this country since 9/11, and is totally unwarranted and unacceptable, and I’m not debating this. In fact, running these ads is probably a really good idea, because if the American public has proven anything to me over the last few years, it’s that I’m insanely out-of-touch with middle America, and middle America is stupid.

However, I’m just find it funny that though the show has gone out of its way to show other Muslims condemning the terrorists actions, and portray three thugs who harassed a Muslim (one was black, one was white, the other Asian, I believe) as bad guys last week (even going so far as to have the black call him “Mohammed” because “that’s what all of your names are” and then get chastised by the police as “a thug”) they PC-Patrol STILL had to take over, and give us little PSAs. I expected it, because this country is so afraid of offending anyone, that all we do is point out how we are offending everyone, and THUS, continuously highlight our differences. It just all seems very counterproductive to me.

Before I get off of my soapbox, I’ll just clarify that last point. What I’m trying to say is that by running these “we’re not all terrorists!” ads, in order to make it all better, we’re merely highlighting the fact that we’re different. Isn’t it enough that they’re just BAD GUYS? Why do we have to connect the dots for people and say, “Really, all Muslims aren’t evil—honest! Check it out, they do good stuff, too!” Again, maybe I’m out of touch, and maybe there’s an 8-year old in Nebraska who will feel better about the next time they meet a Muslim, and the PC-Police will have been proven right. But that just gets me talking about parents letting kids watch 24 in the first place….

Okay, Rant over.

Perhaps the Council on American-Islamic relations should get a mascot thrown in with THIS CREW! Speaking of the PC-Police, the only people worse than them are the Radical Christians. I got it! Perhaps instead of showing how there are, gee-willickers, honest-to God GOOD MUSLIMS out there on their PSAs, the Council should air this video, followed by a message showing that there are CRAZY ASSHOLE CHRISTIANS out there who don't want it to air! If SpongeBob and Pooh Bear aren’t safe from the fundamentalists, no one is.

At least this article gives us perhaps the most amazing piece of journalism I’ve ever read:

SpongeBob, who lives in a pineapple under the sea, was "outed" by the U.S. media in 2002 after reports that the TV show and its merchandise are popular with gays. His creator, Stephen Hillenburg, said at the time that though SpongeBob was an oddball, he thought of all the characters in the show as asexual.

“SpongeBob, who lives in a pineapple under the sea…” fantastic.

And finally, I leave you with this, that shows that every now and then, when someone who’s, you know, a NORMAL person with a working brain steps up and speaks out, some good can happen. Of course I speak of my HERO, John Stewart, who’s clash with Carlson on Crossfire, some outlets have reported, was almost directly responsible for THIS.

Okay, well, that should do it, I hope you enjoyed this episode of the DOSE, which had a little bit o' something for everyone. Don't forget to root for the TTTWNBN this weekend, and WATCH BATTLESTAR GALACTICA!

..oh, and be good to each other.
and send money.

..or a girlfriend.

-apk