DAILY DOSE: "This is the Remix"

I feel like P.Diddy.

 

My assignment today, should I choose to accept it (not that I really have a choice) is to take a co-defendant's Mot. for Summary Judgment, and basically remix it so that it works for our defendant too. See, the argument's all the same, so I just do a little Keycite here, a little cut/paste there and voila! Mix Master K, the Sun Dance Kid, presents to you the Remix version of "Pennsylvania Law Does not Recognize Contribution from Successive Tortfeasors."

 

It's kind of like bein' back in undergrad and writing a paper overnight...if you know what I mean. (Just be sure to cite sources, bitches!)

 

Word.

 

Well, not much else on tap. Yesterday was boring, and I somehow hit a wall right around "Colts: 28, Patsies: 7" and went to be about 11. I'm getting exponentially older every 17 minutes, I swear.  Tonight, though, is a little first date action with The Girl From Saddle Ridge (which sounds like an Eastwood movie... Million Dollar Baby meets Unforgiven...uh oh, I hope Clint doesn't read The Kingdom, he might get an idea and steal another Oscar(tm) from another worthier film like, "A Few Good Men II:  Still Can't Handle the Truth" ..but I digress).  It's looking like K-Pizz and I will be heading to Bar Louie and Dave&Busters in hopes extending the courtship process to another date.  Will there be updates tomorrow? Only if things go well, my dears.  If you've got any sage first-date advice, now's the time...

 

Oh, and I also make my Major League Debut in Motions Court tomorrow.  I'm starting for the Plaintiff (which is weird) and hope to not totally frak up a actually winnable argument about a tolling Statute of Limitations. I know that just went over everyone's head, except for KLE (if she's still out there) but I don't care. This is almost sort of big.  And here I am with my best shirt stuck at the dry-cleaners. This is what one calls "bad planning."  See, this is why I need a girlfriend-- so she can go pick up my dry-cleaning for me while I go on a date...

 

and now I leave you with one final question (not to make light of serious situation, but it really seems like no one cares):

 

If a riot burns Paris to the ground, and nobody gives a shit, because the French are so woefully arrogant the rest of the time that the world's just kind of laughing at them, does it make a sound?

The answer is, of course, "George Bush doesn't care about French people"

 

thank you, thank you-- I'll be here all week, and though that joke was so 29 minutes ago, you should still tip your waitress and try the veal. Wacka-Wacka-Wacka!

 

Uram- write me a column!

-apk