DEAR ABBY,
Dear Kingdomites,
I ventured into Bath & Body Works for the first time last night in hopes of finding a Christmas present suitable for my Legal Assistant, who is awesome. Long story short, I received assitance from a ...what do you even call them in there? A fragrance consultant? Okay, sure- fragrance consultant who was this cute short-haired brunette 'bout my height with amazing brown eyes and a really sexy neck. Your classic WASP-tastic apk-girl.
Anyway, she takes me around the story, we exchange witty banter, etc. And it was more subdued than the normal "this girls flirting with you so you buy stuff" thing. Honestly-- I'm not Buff, I know the stripper-tricks when I see them. This wasn't it- trust me. So I buy a basket for my LA and another for my mom (i needed another present for mom anyhow, and didn't feel like letting the mojo die, anyway). So in the end, she makes sure to impede my progress out of the store, I drop her a "Happy Holidays" and go about my business.
During the conversation in line, I found out she works until 11, she found out I'm attorney buying nice gifts for my LA and my mom: ie: I'm a sweetheart. What I'm saying here is, I feel like I had a legit shot. Ring-check came up negative.
So here's my questions, folks (since i'm clueless in these ways):
1) what's the best way to progress to "are you single" / "can i buy you dinner" AND/OR
2) should i have gone back there like, 15 minutes later, and just been all, "do you have a boyfriend?" if she says yes, I can obviously follow with "That's excellent- i just needed to find out, or i'd be kicking myself all night (or following day-- like i am)" if she says no, i can ask proceed directly to asking her out, right? What's the harm? It's not like I'll be back to Bath & Body Works any time soon, right?
..that is, until i go back tonight.
i'm really clueless, ain't i? KLE- game on.
-apk
I ventured into Bath & Body Works for the first time last night in hopes of finding a Christmas present suitable for my Legal Assistant, who is awesome. Long story short, I received assitance from a ...what do you even call them in there? A fragrance consultant? Okay, sure- fragrance consultant who was this cute short-haired brunette 'bout my height with amazing brown eyes and a really sexy neck. Your classic WASP-tastic apk-girl.
Anyway, she takes me around the story, we exchange witty banter, etc. And it was more subdued than the normal "this girls flirting with you so you buy stuff" thing. Honestly-- I'm not Buff, I know the stripper-tricks when I see them. This wasn't it- trust me. So I buy a basket for my LA and another for my mom (i needed another present for mom anyhow, and didn't feel like letting the mojo die, anyway). So in the end, she makes sure to impede my progress out of the store, I drop her a "Happy Holidays" and go about my business.
During the conversation in line, I found out she works until 11, she found out I'm attorney buying nice gifts for my LA and my mom: ie: I'm a sweetheart. What I'm saying here is, I feel like I had a legit shot. Ring-check came up negative.
So here's my questions, folks (since i'm clueless in these ways):
1) what's the best way to progress to "are you single" / "can i buy you dinner" AND/OR
2) should i have gone back there like, 15 minutes later, and just been all, "do you have a boyfriend?" if she says yes, I can obviously follow with "That's excellent- i just needed to find out, or i'd be kicking myself all night (or following day-- like i am)" if she says no, i can ask proceed directly to asking her out, right? What's the harm? It's not like I'll be back to Bath & Body Works any time soon, right?
..that is, until i go back tonight.
i'm really clueless, ain't i? KLE- game on.
-apk
2 Comments:
hi adam. I can't say I normally read, but i'm sure you’ve heard of me-- I'm Al's friend, lisa, and I've got a few things I need to get off my chest. and I guess this is as good a forum as any because god knows she won’t give me your number because she's afraid I'll kill you. hahaha. (yeah we both know I’m not really joking!) anyway, I love Al. she is the sweetest and most sincere person I know. and for some odd reason, in the past she has liked you more than you appear to have deserved. But seriously-- now you are shouting out to one of her best friends in your plea for dating advice? don't be fooled. KLE understands what's going on. you were lucky enough to have had any kind of relationship at all with someone like Al, but you totally pussied out and handled the whole situation with what seems to be your typical melodrama. And really, I’m over it. But anyway, back to Al. so, you’ve blown it worse than I knew it would ever be possible to blow, and hopefully she'll never give you another chance. So, here's some advice: ask out the girl from the mall. if she actually goes for it, pray she's half as great as what you could have had. and here’s my LAST thought: I really need you to completely stay out of my friend's life so she has room for someone who is loyal to her and treats her like she deserves. And that’s all I have to say for now. good night and good luck. Philly out.
By
Anonymous, at 10:46 PM, December 21, 2005
well, umm...Happy Holidays to Philly.
By
apk, at 6:37 AM, December 22, 2005
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